Close Calls Remembered Beaver Brook

Close Calls Remembered
Beaver Brook
I was a lot younger then, full of fresh zest for the job, a job that gave new meaning to my existence. For as long as I can remember, I was
taught that anything worth doing was worth doing well. This comes from a quote made by Philip Dormer Stanhope 1694-1773 "Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well." Stanhope was the 4th earl of Chesterfield. He was an English statesman and author, noted for his wit and capabilities as an orator. Stanhope held a seat in Parliament and did a stint as lord lieutenant of Ireland. I always wondered who coined the phrase. As for his words, I tried to live up to them whenever I could.
Further, I was also taught to always respect my elders. In 1982 nearly everyone in the Department of Natural Resources was my elder. Me being fairly new to the job, I also wanted to do what I could to prove my worth, even if it meant taking chances. I found it very difficult to say no to any request. After all, I wanted to get ahead in the department and if I said no to folks, my goal would be hampered. I was full of the boyish illusion that people viewed with favor a lad that never refused an assignment, no matter what.
In May of 1982, the Beaver Brook Lake Fire occurred. It was a little smudge of 12000ha in the district where I worked. I had been on a host of smaller wildlalnd fires since 1979; Beaver Brook was my first large one. I had under my belt several of the basic courses of the day put on by a host of characters. Men of great knowledge, men that I learned very quickly to hold in high regard, names such as Stewart, Stymiest, Hovey, Sturgeon, Taylor, and Gilmore to name a few. Thus I had the basics for knowing better. Yet the need to impress my superiors outweighed the knowledge given to me by these learned men. In the back of my mind I remembered the lessons given to me. I just simply chose to ignore the little voices in my head in favor of wanting to please, even in the face of great risk to myself and to others. This being said, there were some things that I did without knowing their pit falls. I would also add that I have never intentionally set out to hurt anyone in my life. Normally, if I knew that what I was about to do might cause harm to another, I would not do it. Yet first I had to know it might cause this harm.
Life is all about experience and experience is all about life. As I look back on some of the things I did, I get a cold chill up my spine. If only I knew then what I know now. But then we call this learning, and it should never stop. I hope I learn until I take my last breath. And even then I will learn the ultimate unknown.
I am not sure of when my great epiphany occurred to cause my ongoing metamorphosis, but I am sure that Paul Gilmore had something to do with it. For this I am eternally grateful, for at this humble station in my life, it is my hope that somehow I might be able to prevent people from making some of the mistakes I made. For perhaps not everyone could be as lucky as I was. Plain and simple, I was lucky. Albeit nice to have luck on ones side, luck is a turn coat that has a habit of being undependable in a tight spot, to say the least. Lady Luck, as it were, has no morals or scruples, she shows up when she feels it is convenient and leaves as quickly with no conscience.
Now with all this said, it is not my intention to have you believe that I am somehow void of mistake making now that I am supposed to be older and wiser, because all that is holy knows I make mistakes every day. Yet, I would like to think the mistakes I make now are made for a different reason. I would also like
to think that I learn very valuable lessons from my short comings with the hope of not meeting up with the same blunder, even if it disguises itself so as not to appear the same, in order to hoodwink me into making the same gaffe.
There came a day, among the very many, when the fire was behaving badly. It was reported that the fire had jumped the line, which was seven cat blades, or bulldozer blades, wide. I was driving an engine to support every one of my coworkers from Gordonsville. The muskeg was there with them and I was to keep it replenished with water so as to help support the lads. It is well worth mentioning that the muskeg was then called TV-180. I didn’t know it at the time but its operator was am man called Mann. I had no way of knowing that he was to become another of my great mentors in the future. But that is another story.
I was headed down road I-I toward the Big Clearwater when I met another engine coming out the road. I did not know the driver of this engine; he flagged me down, he quickly told me that the order was to get out. The fire had jumped the line. I asked who gave the order. He only stated, "My boss ordered it…now turn that truck around and git out!" He told me this with a look of deep concern, as he said it from the open window of his truck; he was driving away at the same time. I will never forget that sight. As he drove away he was not even looking where he was going. His head was stuck out the window looking back at me. As I sat there he seemed to go the longest way in this manner. As I think back on it now, I suppose he was looking to see what I was going to do. Concerned for me as he knew the fire was headed toward me.
At that same time, my supervisor’s voice came booming over the radio. "Smith where the hell are you…get back here as soon as you can…we’re all out of water. And there is fire everywhere!" Quickly forgetting what the other driver had told me, and not wanting to see my lads in need of water and me not there to give it to them, I threw caution to the wind and proceeded to go where angles fear to tread. At the time the fire jumping the line was the farthest thing from my mind. All I could think about was my lads needed me and I wasn’t there. I informed my boss I was on my way.
The road progressively got narrower and rougher the further in one went. Thus speed was not a luxury that was available to me. At a point where the road made a ninety-degree turn to the right, I witnessed something that has stayed with me all these years. At the strangest of times the vision will pop into my mind with haunting effects each time it does. Through the smoke and fire that leapt up out of the ditch appeared a porcupine. Under normal circumstances these creatures have a slow waddling gate. Not this one, it moved quickly in a very confused manner. It would take a few steps ahead, stop and complete a full circle, then rear up on it’s hind legs and bob it’s head up and down. What was even worse about this picture was the fact that it’s quills tips were glowing orange and with smoke rolling up from them. I can only imagine the pain and terror this poor creature must have been feeling. My first impulse was to stop and douse the creature with water. But this would have taken time and my lads were in need of my getting to them as quickly as I could.
Shortly, I came over the crest of a knoll to a man on the road flailing his arms wildly in the air. Obviously he wanted me to stop, so I did. He informed me that I was to turn my truck and head out. Not knowing who this man was, and him not wearing a department uniform, I considered him no boss of mine. I was in a hurry and had no time to be arguing with someone I did not know. Quickly and to the point, my advice to him was to get out of my way, I had some lads waiting on my arrival and I did not want to disappoint them. He then told me that he was my boss and that I had to do as he told me, all the time walking to the front of my engine to block my path. I told him he was not my boss, "My boss is waitin on me back in there an I aim to git to im." I then reiterated my advice to him, and shortly there after I popped the clutch of Old Thunder Rock, the name of the engine I was driving, and jammed my foot down on the gas. As the engine sprang ahead with the roar of a cannon, the man moved out of the way sputtering some sort of profanities at me as I passed. He wagged his finger at me as if to say I was in for it now. I paid him no other mind. I was just glad that he had moved for I had no intention of easing up on his account. It wasn’t until much later that I thought about my actions. The man was only working in my best interest and I was willing to run him down for his efforts. It would have been a hard one to explain. What was I thinking, or an even better question, why was I not thinking?
All that lay in front and behind me now was engulfed in smoke. The heat from the fire was intense, so much so, I had rolled up my window and leaned toward the middle of the seat in order to bare the pain I felt on my left side from the radiant heat. Still I rolled on more by feel than by sight.
By and by, I broke out into an old clear cut where there was no fire at all. Here the smoke had cleared and with no fire near me, I was able to make better time, and with the relief of the window down again. A wave of fear came over me as I thought about what I had just come through. Another thing that bothered me was the fact that I had not heard from any of my lads in what seemed like an eternity. In reality it had only been a few minutes. I had a radio; all I had to do was call them. However, I refrained from this as I had been taught not to tie up the air ways unless it was important. Besides, I had my orders, I had heard nothing different, and thus I plunged onward. I kept telling myself that I was okay and that the lads were too.
Finally I reached the cat guard. Here I turned left, and I started to drive up the freshly bulldozed trail. The guard went up through another old clear cut on a steep slope. Near the top of the slope the clear cut met up with forest. As I crawled my way up the slope with Old Thunder Rock, I could see that no one would have to worry about cutting this forest any time soon, it was all on fire.
A new sense of fear came over me. Here I was headed into an inferno, the likes of which I had never witnessed before, looking to meet up with the lads. Search as I might, I saw no sign of them anywhere.
As I progressed up the rough slope, my speed had decreased even more. All I had to do was keep my foot on the gas and steer. This gave me time to realize the desperateness of my situation. I am as brave as any man, willing to muscle up the courage to do what needs to be done, but now I was petrified. It suddenly occurred to me that I should have been more scared some time before that. Maybe then I would not be in this situation. Yet here I was and I had it to deal with now.
Then, at about three quarters the way up the slope, out through the smoke stepped a figure of a man that I knew. It was Basil, one of the Rangers I worked with. He wasn’t moving fast, and he didn’t seem excited. This should not have surprised me, for it was in his nature not to get excited over anything. He always told me, as he put it, "There ain’t no sense in gittin all excited, it’ll just give ya high blood pressure, an that there ain’t no good fer no one. An besides, gittin yerself all worked up ain’t gonna change nothin." All I knew was, I was extremely happy to see him. Shortly, one appeared out of the smoke behind the other, Brian, then Doug, and Don, with the muskeg, TV-180 pulling up the rear. I had thought that Mike was with them, however, it turned out he was trapped in the middle of the Clearwater stream with Mel, another Ranger. They had with them two bulldozers, along with their operators and a couple of crews of men. They were in the process of being air lifted out of harms way by a helicopter.
Now with the sense of relief that everyone was well and accounted for, my feeling of hopelessness was replaced with the calm of everything would be all right. There was no thought of having to get back out of what I had come through to get here. My new found calm did not last long.
As Doug walked up to me he said. "Git yer truck turned and plank’er fer out a here." The look on his face when he said it told me he didn’t want me to do any dilly-dallying. I began surveying the cat guard for a place wide enough to turn. Ahead of me a few yards there was a spot that seemed my best bet, so I made for that location. After carefully engaging my turn, taking longer than what Doug thought I should have, I finally got Old Thunder Rock headed back down the hill.
When I got to the bottom of the hill where the cat guard met the road, I stopped long enough to fill TV-180 up with water. By the time this task was finished, the lads were all headed out the road in front me in their half tons. TV-180 was again bringing up the rear following along behind me.
It turned out that the going back out was not as troublesome as the trip in. In the places that were the worst coming in, the fire had crossed the road and although it was still hot and smoky, it was no where near as bad as when I had come in. I remember looking in my right side mirror at the towering pillar of grey to black smoke behind us. It put me in mind of a show I’d seen on television that was dealing with atomic bombs. In some strange ways, the entire thing didn’t seem real to me at the time.
When I reached the ninety degree turn there was no sign of the porcupine. I have always been soft hearted when it comes to animals. I couldn’t help but wonder what had become of the poor little critter. To think of the pain and confusion he must have been in. It bothered me bad, and still does when I think of it to this day.
After a time we arrived at the Clearwater airstrip and safety. The lads all went to some sort of high level meeting right away upon our arrival. Me being an underling, and not needed at such significant affairs, I concerned myself with going over Old Thunder Rock to ensure all was well with him and his contents.
It was at this time that I discovered that on the driver side of the engine, the paint was bubbled and scorched from the heat I encountered on my expedition in to meet the lads. Upon this discovery, and with the time on my hands to think more clearly, I almost took to shaking with the realization of what had just happened. Or what’s more, what didn’t happen that easy could have. I realized that had it not been for ol Lady Luck being of good temperament on this day, things might have turned out a whole lot different.
Below in point form are some notations to be considered.
No matter how much you want to please folks, safety for all concerned should be first and foremost in your mind.
It is imperative that you inform supervisors of a task that is unsafe. Further, supervisors should not look with ill favor upon such reports.
We use LACES now, in 1982 we did not. Ask how many unsafe acts could have been mitigated if we had used LACES.
Communication is vital. Perhaps if I had taken the time to inform my superiors of what I was seeing they would have told me to do something different.
Listen to what your gut instinct is telling you. If something is telling you it might be dangerous, it likely is.
Do not shrug off what others are telling you. They are telling you for a reason. Take the time again to communicate properly. Even if they are not your supervisors consider what they are saying. Never ignore anyone who is trying to tell you of a safety hazard. For God’s sake don’t try to run them down!
Count the times I was in harms way. Also count the ways in which I put others in harms way.
Was panic or fear a factor in clouding my judgment? Was I blind to what was really going on?
How could I have done things different? How would you have done things different? Remember, I did not want my boss to consider me insubordinate. Should fear of insubordination stop us from being safe?
The road was narrow and rough with few turning spots. Safe or Unsafe?
The heat bubbled the paint on the truck. Safe or Unsafe?
I was driving by feel more than sight. Safe or Unsafe?
There was no review after the fact. If there had been, would these things have been less likely to occur in the future?
I was embarrassed to talk about this with my coworkers. Should being embarrassed have anything to do with it?
Is it acceptable for coworkers to make others feel embarrassed?

At the time there was no structured formal fire behavior training, had there been, could it have made a difference?
No one told me what the fire weather indices were on any of the 31 days I was on this fire. Had I known what the indices really meant, and had I been given them, would it have changed anything?
Should wanting to do a good job, or please supervisors, over shadow safety?
There is a reason why people try to teach us something. Usually it is because they want to keep us out of harms way. Sometimes the teaching comes from real life experiences. No course or learning is meant to be Mickey Mouse. A lot of people put a lot of time into these courses. We should try our best to heed what these courses teach us. Yet, we must keep in mind that common sense should always prevail.
If there were such things as fire behavior forecast back then, would they have been likely to change the way we did things? See how many other things you can identify that were not done correctly.
In the final analysis, what difference did my getting there make?
In retrospect, there will be some that will simply chuckle and claim that I was a very foolish young man. Some may even say this about me now. And that will be all that some will think about it. Be that as it may, there are very important reasons why I take the time to do the things I do now.
Considering my actions to be silly and thinking nothing more about it is the easy way out. The truth of the matter is, there were a host of factors involved that led me to do the things I did.
I was indeed young. However, my gut was telling me what I was doing was not the right things to do. So why did I still persist in plunging onward?
We all want and need to know that we are doing a good job. We need to have acceptance from our supervisors. We can say that it does not matter what people think of us, yet, deep inside, it in fact, really does. No one wants to be considered a coward, fool, or slacker. No one wants to be considered an insubordinate.
You see, I know first hand what it feels like to be considered these things. I know if I have felt it, others have felt it too. It is only human nature to do everything that is possible not have these terrible feelings. Even to the point of putting one’s self and others in harms way. We are willing to gamble with our lives and the lives of others in order to avoid these feelings. Thus it is a serious problem. Somehow we must learn to eradicate this type of thinking. Part of the solution here rest with supervisors.
In 1982 we were quite happy to do as those before us had done. Learn through the school of hard knocks. It was left to our own devises as to whether we learned anything or not. Because of pride, we did not want anyone thinking us to be less capable than anyone else. Learning this way might at some misfortunate time be the last thing we get a chance to learn.

There were indeed some things that I just didn’t know because of inexperience. Some things I just had not been taught yet. Yet, I wonder even if I had been taught them, would I have done things very much the same? In my mind I likely would have because of the fear of being considered all of those terrible things that no one wants to feel.
It is called pressure folks. It comes in many forms and we must do everything in our power to find ways to eradicate this thinking.
Peer pressure, pressure from the public, pressure from company people, self pressure, are all key factors in why tragedies happen. In a lot of tragedies or near misses we can say things like he knew better. If he knew better then why did it happen? Pressure.
We can set back and analyze endless events looking for the why. In some cases miscommunication is the key. In some cases no communication is the factor. In some situations over confidence and arrogance is the explanation. I feel a lot of these are driven by pressure.
Why didn’t I just call on the radio to let my boss know what I faced? Yes I was told not to tie up the radio unless it was important. Yet I knew even then that what I faced was important. I think it was fear of perhaps looking like I was an idiot or coward in my peer’s eyes. After all everyone with a radio would have heard me. Pressure.
Why did I choose to ignore warnings from other people, to the point of no regard for another man’s safety? Pressure. I could only think of disappointing my coworkers and what they would think of me if I let them down. I wonder what people would have thought of me if the man had fell as I lunged the truck ahead and I had ran over him. It was in my mind that he would move, but what if he hadn’t, what if he had fell?
I believe that pressure in it’s many forms is one of the key things we need to overcome on the road to safer decision making. As stated before, supervisors must play a key role in this. When you embarrass a coworker by putting him down for a mistake made or if you laugh at him or her, you have set in stone an impression that may be very hard to overcome. After you have imbedded this feeling in a person, they maybe very reluctant in the future to say anything, even in times when a life is at stake.
It is my belief that we can change this. It is my belief that it starts with me and you.
I have learned that you can give people the best training in the world. Yet, if folks still give into the various forms of pressure, accidents will still happen even if they know better. Attitudes toward each other must change.
Some will say that we will never be able to get rid of pressure. I agree that some forms will always be present. However, there are some forms we can eradicate. Identifying and admitting what is really causing a problem is a huge step in the right direction. Admitting to yourself that there are these pressures is very important. Once this is accomplished, we then can learn to expel certain types of pressure and learn to cope with the ones that we can not get rid of. What we can not do is continue to give in to these pressures. In so doing we are depending on Lady Luck and she will at some point abandon us with no regard of the consequences.
The choice is ours, we can laugh and shrug it off or we can begin to try and do something about it.
Until next time, above all else, Stay Safe!
RL Tex Smith
November 29, 2005