Timber Teegers

Timber Teegers

I mind the time back in the summer of 2000, I found myself in the great state of Montana. I was there with a bunch a fellers ta try and help out with the fires what was reekin havoc all over that there state.We each got hooked up with a crew a military folks an we became their crew leaders. They was twenty a them there young folks in each crew, both men and women.My outfit came from the Montana Air National Guard; an they called us Prairie seven. Now they was some of the nicest youngens I ever did meet up with. They was used ta takin orders an they was no back talk er fellers with a case a the cutes among em. Gives me the willies now as I think on it, cause jus over a year later, a lot those youngens in that there outfit was in a place called Iraq, an that there was a horse of a different color as compared to them there fires.I stayed in touch with a few of them, but like always happens, the letters got fewer and fewer till all ta once, they stopped all ta gether. The one I stayed in touch with fer the longest was the crew medic. We called her Band-Aid, but even she quit writin, and so it jus leaves a body ta wonder. Are they all still ok? Where are they now an what kind a adventure are they into these here days?Well sir, they is this old movie on the late late show by times called “The Devil’s Brigade”. It’s a story based on true ta life happnins. See in world war two they was a bunch a Canadian soldiers and a bunch of American soldiers what joined up an trained ta gether. Them there fellers became the first Special Forces outfit that there ever was. Their base when they was a trainin was called Fort William Henry Harrison. It was located near the city of Helena. Now whad-ya spose, that there fort was just exactly where we all ended up ta give them there youngens some trainin in wildland fire, a for they went ta the real deal.Now I figured that there was quite a thing, here we was a bunch a Canadians an a bunch of Americans teamin up agin ta do battle. Only the enemy weren’t in far away places like the Aleutian Islands, Italy, er the South of France. No sir, this here time the enemy was right here on the home front.Fightin a big ol fire in a lot a ways is just the same as a war. They onliest thing is, the fire don’t shoot back, aw… it likes ta try an trap ya an eat ya every so often; but ya just don’t let it out think ya, an most times you’d be jus fine.Any way…oncest the trainin was done each crew was given an assignment and off we all went. Them youngens, as is always the way, was a chomppin at the bit ta git at er.Ar outfit got several light assignments and when Command and us crew leaders figured they was ready, we got assigned to the real deal. Prairie seven ended up on the Tauston Maudlow Fire and she was a big- en.We started out on the tail end a that there fire a buildin hand line. I watched them youngens close an as near as I could tell, they was doin a right fine job. We worked all day and then came back to git cleaned up an have some grub. Plan the next day, an then crawl in ar tents an hit the feathers.I was a layin there tryin ta hunker down fer some shut eye when of a sudden the wind commenced ta blow. An I mean blow. I got up an took my wind gauge out ta see just what was a happnin. Now whilst I was a measurin the wind, I looked over yonder an saw a half dozen small tents go a rollin by. The Guard had rigged us crew leaders up a big ol tent, we had cots an the works. I got a few a the lads up an toll em we bes tighten the riggin lines on ar tent a for she went the great routetoo. So Dad an Bozo, the Bear, an a few others came quick ta give a hand at doin jus that.Well sir, that there wind was a blowin a steady fifty miles per hour with gusts up ta seventy, an it kept it up all night. An jus as the sun was a comin up, she quit jus as bout as fast she started.At the morning briefing the Incident Commander (IC), who happened ta be a woman, and one I could tell what had no patience fer tom foolery, said “Well folks…as ya’all might a guessed by now….ar fire in the night, on account a that wind has decided ta git up an leave us.” And leave us it did, the head end a that there fire was now fifty miles beyond us.So it was decided we all would go to the line an work the day an whilst we was out workin, the Guard would move ar tents and riggin closer so as ta ketch up with that monster. That way we wouldn’t have so far ta travel ta git ta work in the days that follered.I don’ t know if a feller could rightly say that we made a whole lot a head way that day, but we dug an scratched the day away tryin at least. In this here area, they weren’t accustomed ta usin water ta fight the fire, cause the water was danged scarus. Bein as though there weren’t many waterin holes, we used dirt an made hand lines. An ya know by dingies a lot a the time it worked.So like I said, we dug an scratched an beat an thrashed the day away; an come the end, my outfit was plumb spent. It was a good thing that the IC had enough sense to look ahead an have the Guard set up ar riggin, cause I ain’t sure my folks coulda done it.They had set us up in a cow pasture an it was a big-en. That thing was full a cow pies. Now that there didn’t bother us none, but what I found out later bothered me in a big way.Everyone was mullin around and gittin ar new tent city up ta snuff. I noticed that there cow field was full a holes in the ground about two inches round. Now I never give it no thought, other than ta wonder what on earth made so many a the things.By an by I saw a bunch a Army Guard fellers from another outfit, they was all hunkered down around them holes. Me bein on the curious side a things, I walked up to em an said “what-cha doin fellers?” All at the same time I could see that they had their Leatherman pliers out an they was a proddin them there holes with em. Them lads not bein from my outfit jus kind a looked up at me, an this one big ol bald headed feller said “You’ll see”.Now where I’m from if some feller gives you an answer like that there, ya bes put yer guard up. An me not likin surprises a whole lot, I did jus that. As they went back ta proddin in them there holes, not payin me much mind, I said “what made all these holes in the ground anyway?” That same bald headed feller kind a grinned and said “Timber Teegers”. With a puzzled look I said “Is that a fact…well I don’t guess I ever did hear tell of a critter like that…whad-a them Timber Teegers look like?”Old Baldy looked half disgusted as he said “You know…ground Squirrels…er don’t ya’all have Squirrels up in Canada?” Now this here feller was actin a bit on the cute side, as some are bound ta do. But I never let it bother me none, cause I figured he was jus testing me out, ta see what kind a reaction I’d have ta him actin a bit snotty. “Oh heck yes…we got Squirrels…an lots of em…Onliest thing is, they stay in the trees where they is supposed ta be…we got us enough trees back home that they don’t have ta go digging in the dirt ta find a home….So…ifthem there holes is made by Timber Teegers…whad-a-ya fixin ta do with them there pliers….pull imm out by the whiskers?”Jus then old Baldy up an stuck them pliers right in my face. An stuck in them pliers was a big ol spider. Well sir, I don’t like spiders none. So I stepped back in a hurry. When I got my senses gathered, I lit in ta ol Baldy. As I stepped back closer agin I said “Now young feller….I know its likely that you bin trained ta kill a man with yer hands in more ways than I could care less about….I know yer jus tryin ta have you some fun…but I’m here ta tell ya what. Don’t ya’all ever stick no spider in my old phizog ever agin…cause ifn ya do…I’m gona have ta show ya’all what a good ol boy from Carleton County is a capable of!”Well heck, as soon as they seen I wasn’t gona cower and run they changed their tune. They all apologized all over them selves why even ol Baldy said he was sorry.See in everyone a them holes which was sure nough made by Timber Teegers, they was a funnel shaped web. An in every one a them there webs was a Black Widow spider. They toll me all about how the big-ens was the females and the little fellers the males. They showed me one hole where a body could see the little fellers all a clamberin over the big female. They said the females were lookin fer a mate. An as soon as the lucky feller got hisself picked, after he was done he got hisself a good reward…the cussed ol female would kill an eat imm.Funny…as I think on it….I guess I’ve known a woman er three jus like that. Aw but, them there are other stories.Anyway, I made my way back ta tell the lads about what I had learnt. When I toll the story we all looked at one an nother an we made it fer ar tent. Whad-ya spose…sure nough we counted us seven holes in the ground on the inside a ar tent. See, ar tent didn’t have no floor.Well sir, that there started a big ol fracas. We all kind a revolted, an ta make a long story short, I slept with ol Bear in one a them there Army Hum Vees, some a the other lads slept in the Army Duce an a halfs, while others slept on the back a them ol trucks. All I know is that none a us fellers slept in the tent that there night.See a Rattler he’ll let a body know when ya git too close. But them thereWid-ers…they’ll crawl right in bed with a body an jus bite-cha out pure meanness.We only had ta stay there in what we named Spiderville for the one night. Cause the fire up an took off that night too. So we ended up in the Canyon Lake Ferry District set up on the site of a fair grounds. There weren’t a sign of a hole no where there bouts. Never seen no more Wid-ers either.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

RL Tex Smith