Ramblings 3

Ramblings 3
They say that we are made up of a little piece of everyone we know. I would like to think that this is true. When we think about it, even the folks that we don’t agree with or ones that do stuff we wouldn’t do, we learn from.
I have always tended to really like the older folks. When I was kid, you could find me hanging out around the park benches where the old lads seem to congregate. Whether it was down by the theatre, the salmon pool, in front of the stores, or at the garage; wherever they hung out I would go just to listen to their stories.
This carried over into my adult life. I can remember playing thirty-ones for hour upon hour at the Legion with the old lads. I have many fond memories of my old friends. Sadly, a lot of them are gone now. I think of them often and wish they were still around. But that can never be, so I try and keep their memories alive.
In a way that helps them to live on, or at least that’s what I think. Maybe the old saying is true. Maybe we are a part of all those that we know and have known.
When we read a book, like true history for example, we learn. I think that especially with Biographies, it’s like a part of that particular person becomes part of us.
This is not to say that we are exactly like someone else, thank God we are not. What I mean is, if I read a book on Robert E. Lee I learn from the great military genius. When I read about Rudolph Giuliani I learn from him as well. Then I have in me parts of both of these fine men. Then I combine this with all the others I have learned from, and I become one of a kind.
I have often told students, in the fire world, that I am teaching; the one thing I know for certain is how little I know. I can remember some of the other instructors saying to me that I shouldn’t say that. Their argument was that I was supposed to know and I am sending the wrong message. To this I always answered, on the contrary, I am being honest, and I think that it is incumbent upon me to be just that, honest. The more I learn the more there is to learn, and it should never stop. I say the day it does, will be the day I take up the rocking chair.
To me the person that conveys an attitude of I know everything, or at least think they think they do, are most times the people that get others hurt and worse, sometimes killed.
Learning from the old lads around my town was a true adventure for me, it still is.
They were teaching me things without even knowing that they were doing so. I watched them and I listened as they talked to one and other.
Sometimes other kids would come around and make fun of them. They never said anything they just looked at them and the only thing different was their expressions and their eyes. One time, there were even some of these disrespectful kids that demanded money from the old fellers; when they refused to give them any money, one brat spat on one old lads leg. Now he just slowly took out his hanky and wiped it off. The only thing that was said was, “you young-ens bess git on yer way….an ya bess do er now”. It wasn’t said loud or in an angry way. But it was said in a way that was low and direct, a way that meant business, in a tone that made them believe that it was said with all seriousness. Combined with a look that was of kind I had never seen before. It was for me scary. It must have been for the brats too, for I can remember them staring at the old man silently, then for some reason, one of the brats said, “come guys…lets
leave these crazy old bastards alone….they ain’t gonna give us no money” and off they went, and quickly too.
As I think back on it, my learning curve took a huge leap that day. I learned that becoming anything that resembled those brats was something I never wanted to do. I would never disrespect my elders or anyone else, not on purpose anyway. I learned that after this episode, the old mans face and eyes showed something terrible; it showed pure hurt. I knew I never wanted to cause that kind of hurt for anyone, not on purpose. I got a chance to see what true cowardice was and what true grit was. I came away from that situation respecting that old man far more than any words could ever describe.
Everyone from the people we hold in high esteem to those we think less of, (and yes we all do that, it is wrong to do it, but we all do) deserve respect from us. If we don’t know all the story of a person’s life we have no right to judge them. We have no right to judge another person period. But again, we all do it in some form or another; to me its one of mankind’s ugliest features.
What makes us feel like we are better than others? Is it money? A nicer home? A nicer car? I think there are a host of combined reasons. We all have this ugliness within us. We are outright lying if we say other wise. We have known it all along too. We just don’t like to admit it. You know, I made a better mark on the test than he or she did…so I am smarter. I have a nicer bike, so I am better. I got more goals than the others so I am a better player. And then my favourite of all wrongs…I go to church and he doesn’t….so I am better. Ugly I say, that is what it is, pure ugliness.
Another time I was setting with one of my oldest and dearest friends in front of the grocery store on the bench. It was a great day, the sun was shinning and we were having a gereat talk. Then along came a so called wonder of goodness, a so called good living man, a so called good church going God fearing man, a so called outstanding citizen. My friend looked up and said a kind good day to this person. The person looked back at him and shook his head with disgust and a pure look of repulsiveness, turned his head back ahead, stuck his nose in the air and continued on with out speaking a word. My friend turned to me and said “some folks would as soon die as to speak to a feller”. I agreed but I also seen something; it was that look again, it was hurt.
I learned again on that day. It seems that the learning never stopped when I was around my older friends. I hope I can somehow convey to others, especially my children to be the same way when it comes to learning. I hope they always respect others.
In the next few writings I hope to talk about a few of my old friends. I would hope that all that read my writings know that these people were and are some of my dearest friends. I have nothing but the greatest admiration for each of them. And if I write something that somehow is taken in a way that makes them look small or less, it will surely not be my intent. It will be an accident if I do.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
RL Tex Smith